Shit Talkin'

03/05/10 by Jonathan | Announcements, Blog | 5 Comments »

This is courtesy of Paul Chek http://paulchek.com/ and Hulse Strength http://www.hulsestrength.com/do-you-know-your-shit-part-1/.  Thanks to Tori for finding this on the interwebs and sending it along!

Paul Chek created the diagram below to help his patients understand what to look for in the bowl after an “excretion episode”. Study the pictures and perhaps you’ll notice a character that looks like the creature that stares back at you from the throne. Below the diagram is a brief description of each poop-animation, and the cause for its existence.

Poopie Line Up (from left to right)
The image above is from Paul Chek’s – How To Eat Move and Be Healthy
Sinker n’ Stinker – This guy is named as he behaves. He is like a smelly piece of black coal that sinks to the bottom of the bowl after an arduous attempt to squeeze him out with tremendous force. His appearance is due to an over exposure to toxins such as processed foods, environmental toxins and medical drugs.
The Swimmer – This guy is light in color and floats. He is a pain to flush. His appearance is due to a high content of undigested fat.
Bodybuilder – This dude is JACKED! He is typically big and round. He makes you strain to get him out of ya. If you pop a blood vessel in your eye ball when you poop, you’ve probably met this guy. His appearance is due to eating too many protein bars and shakes.
Pellet Man – Looks like rabbit poop. His appearance is due to altered states between peristalsis and dehydration.
Diarrhea – “If you’re sliding into first, and you feel something burst… “, this guy needs no introduction. His appearance is due to your crappy diet and your body’s attempt to purge you of it.
The Flasher – If you can identify what you’ve eaten by looking at your poop, you are being flashed! Undigested food particles making an appearance in your bowl is a sure sign that this guy has crashed your party. His appearance is due to food intolerance and an inflamed gut wall.
The Poopie Policeman – This guy is “The Shit”! He is what all of our poopies strive to look like. He is Well Shaped (with a consistent contour), Passes Easily, Light Brown In Color, Smells Earthy – not foul, yet he floats… but not too much. Mmmm.